Goings on (headlines can be a fun reading experience, no matter what the horrendous vile stomach-churning grotesque vomit-inducing subject matter)

Posted: November 19, 2009 in Current events
Tags:
  • Church of Scientology being investigated for torture. What’s it trying to do–emulate Islam? What can we expect in the future–videos of  Scientologist Tom Crusise beheading unbelievers?
  • Don’t you hate being in a bar with someone that trows darts at the patrons and then deficates in the parking lot where people have to walk to get to their cars? Here.
  • World’s most expensive symbolic middle finger gesture siphons off  a quarter mil from gross profits but receives flying finger of shame award.
  • Illegal aliens now arriving in suitcases. Hey it’s no more crowded than fifty in a car trunk. Here.
  • Only in Sweden: Jesus Christ arrested for driving without a license. Here if you don’t believe me.
  • “You wait years for The Beatles to be available in MP3 and then two come at once. First we had the BlueBeat Beatles, in which the band’s performances were recreated using ‘psycho acoustic simulation’, and now we have The Parallel Universe Beatles…” At least their back. Here.
  • 10-year old girl refuses to take shower at home. Police taser her. But is this really the best way to get a clean kid?  Here and here.
  • The Hulkster does the blade trick for posterity. Here.
  • Lawyers make the laws then suckle the cream. Here.
  • Third World Mexico sending money to Third World America.  “Unemployment has hit migrant communities in the United States so hard that a startling new phenomenon has been detected: instead of receiving remittances from relatives in the richest country on earth…” Had to happen sooner or later. Here.
  • Radical Muslim cleric born in New Mexico inspires terror. Did you say New Mexico? Yes. Our New Mexico in the US of A? That’s right, you heard right, right here in the US of A. Here.
  • The horrendous horrible horror of sitting down to Thanksgiving dinner with family members you detest and hatefully hate to the nth degree of n. Here.
  • Liberals bring it on with Palin again: say her fashion still reeks of “Fashiongate”. If you’ll recall from the campaign, Palin Fashiongate is far far worse than Watergate or any Gate known to modern man. Here.
  • “…Annabel became an escort three years ago, in between working full time as a session musician. I meet her in the lobby bar of a plush hotel in Mayfair, Central London. Blonde, slim and pretty, she looks not unlike Dr Brooke Magnanti, the Bristol research scientist who recently outed herself as the call girl Belle de Jour…” Here.
  • Females are fickle by nature?  “Women are unpredictable by nature. A study has concluded that males are much more consistent in their personalities than females are. The trend applies across the animal kingdom, from humans to birds, according to the review of 35 years of research…” Jesus Christ God Almighty God, female birds too? Are you jiving me, bro, are you serious?  Here.
  • On the Jewish version of the Taliban: “They are 100% kosher. Yet, over the years, they have been called and often treated by ultra-Orthodox Jews as if they were ‘Nazis, pigs, destroyers, witches, satanic, fools, feminists, and enemy politicals.’ ” Here.
  • Helskini’s pool time disrupted by hairy masturbating immigrants. Here.
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