The bad: “Angry neighbors claim Fersedy bathes in a stairwell using a hose, relieves himself in the yard, plays his radio all night and walks around half-nude…” Here.
The good: It’s clear that we still hold a fellow human being to a higher hygienic standard than a dog; after all, dogs urinate (among other things) in the yard all the time and we say nothing.
“The newest moniker to join this happy parade is “cougar”. Cougars aren’t new — the term was first coined in America in the 1990s, but it’s now everywhere thanks to a US television series called Cougar Town, starring Courteney Cox Arquette, formerly the anally retentive one in Friends. As a result of its screening on ABC, women, it seems, are queuing up to call themselves cougars, although “total dingbat” might be more appropriate….What bothers me, though, is the way in which women are no longer allowed (by anyone, themselves included) to be anything other than sexual. If you’re not up for it, you might as well be dead: get with it, nanna, flash us some cleavage….” Here.
Bitch! “Hey, Miley Cyrus, you made $25 million last year – toss a dollar in the tip cup [bitch]. The “Hannah Montana” star got $70 worth of steak and mac and cheese for herself and sister Brandi [bitches] at the Outback Steakhouse in Burbank last Sunday. Our spy says she [bitch] pulled an envelope of Benjamins out of her purse and handed one over, “but she [bitch] kept all the change.” Here. Advice to Outback guys: put all you Hannah Montana stuff in a big pile outside the building and hire a steamroller to run over it (that’s what I’m doing).
Case of the all to0 itchy trigger finger. Now this is funny: Florida man gets up in the middle of the night after hearing an intruder in the hallway– right, you already know the rest of the story. Anyway here’s the really funny part: ” ‘I thought I had an intruder in the house. Honest to God, she looks dead,’ he told the operator between sobs. ‘We were supposed to get married this Saturday.’ “
And Dlisted says (direct quote)…”Here’s a little tale that will tickle your tonsils and make your genitals pass out. Some source (*cough*Tommy’s dildo cleaner*cough*) told OK! Magazine (via Showbiz Spy) that Stepford Katie is helping her alien master lose some chunk in his titties by giving sex to him any chance she gets. I tried picturing these two assholes rubbing on each other, but all I got was a 404 error…”