Cynic’s family Christmas

What to do?…Uncle B (short for Boon) offers the cynic a Christmas libation, but there is much to muse about before accepting. Is the cup clean? How do I know Uncle B hadn’t first taken a swig directly from the bottle, which he’s been known to do? In that case there may well be many molecules of backwash in the cup, diluted as it might be–but still, the thought nauseates the cynic; Boon’s teeth are dark green and look like eyeless insects; and how does the cynic know he hadn’t urinated or spit in it at some time in the recent past, as he’s been known to do. But of course the cynic must accept the cup (Unlce B carries a hunting knife in his belt). So now the problem becomes not whether to accept the cup or not but what to do once the cup is accepted. The cynic will do what the cynic must do: He will clandestinely pour the contents on the floor under the table and blame it on grandmother’s bladder problem. (Oh, please do not worry about grandmother. She carries a long titanium darning needle under her bonnet. Uncle B will be lucky if he gets his knife even halfway out of his pants before his agonizing demise.)

________________________

Note: From bottom center L to R: Cynic Boon (yours truly), Little sister Sheba Boon, Father Boon, Virgin Mary Boon, Uncle Ignatius Boon, and the village whore (and only worker), Jezebel Boon. Source: the Boon Family chronicles

The Grand Banana Republic: Prognosis? Dissolution… Cure? None in sight

“Buried in the Oct. 30 Washington Post was a bland headline: “Report Points to Faster Recovery in Jobs for Immigrants.” The story, however, contained social dynamite that explains the rage of Americans who are smeared as nativists and xenophobes for demanding a timeout on immigration. In the April-May-June quarter, foreign-born workers in the U.S. gained 656,000 jobs. And native-born Americans lost 1.2 million…” Here.

Related: Yeap…

Freakazoids on parade…

Freakazoids: Jack Birch, Thora Birch for being totally annoying … “Mr. Alexander, the director, said that ‘it was odd to have Jack Birch around so much, but that it hadn’t really been a problem until Thursday.’ At another point during Thursday’s rehearsal, Mr. Alexander said he noticed Mr. Birch peering through a window that was part of a library set while a scene with Ms. Birch was underway. ‘I couldn’t believe my eyes and turned to a crew member and said, ‘Is that Jack Birch looking through the window at Thora?’ ” Here (NY Times) and here (IFC)

Freakazoid: Allen West for being a fascist neocon  nut case):… “And I think that we also should be censoring the American news agencies which enabled him to do this and also supported him and applauding him for the efforts…” Here (HuffPo)

Freakazoid: TSA screener for putting pressure on the underside of this guys testicles)… ” ‘He started running his hands all over my body,’  Powers said in an interview. ‘He went all the way up to my crotch and put pressure on the underside of my testicles…’ ” Here (News Observer).

Freakazoid: Fascist government of Sweden for prosecuting Julian Assange for not wearing a condom. Here (Reuters).

Freakazoid: Elitist piece of trash Spencer Bachus for being an elitist piece of trash…”Washington’s role is to serve the banks…” Here (Daily Bail)

Slowly, then faster, the Grand Banana Republic is building its police state

The insidious monster is gradually taking hold, not only in emerging new Homeland Security edicts (as in Police State), but in the “little” incidents occurring daily, as, for example, Police storm house and execute puppies.

The Imperial Banana

“The United States considers itself a shining beacon of democracy and openness, but for many Europeans Washington’s fierce reaction to the flood of secret diplomatic cables released by WikiLeaks displays imperial arrogance and hypocrisy, indicating a post-9/11 obsession with secrecy that contradicts American principles… (here)” No argument here. This place will still be preaching its democratic ideals even after it becomes a police state like China. Its hypocrisy is mind-boggling. “While the Obama Administration,” the article continues,  ”has done nothing in the courts to block the publication of any of the leaked documents, or …tried to indict WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange for any crime, American officials and politicians have been widely condemned in the European news media for calling the leaks everything from “terrorism” (Rep. Peter T. King [a former terrorist IRA supporter] to ‘an attack against the international community’ (…Hillary Clinton). Secretary of Defense Robert M. Gates called the arrest of Mr. Assange on separate rape charges ‘good news,’ while Sarah Palin called for him to be hunted as an ‘anti-American operative with blood on his hands’ and Mike Huckabee…said that he should be executed [as did another neo-con Bill O'Reilly].” There’s a ton of these quaking holier-than-thou freaks out there.

We are the masters now: the Chinese crescendo is building.

” ‘We are the masters now.’ I wonder if President Barack Obama saw those words in the thought bubble over the head of his Chinese counterpart, Hu Jintao, at the G20 summit in Seoul… If the president was hoping for change he could believe in—in China’s currency policy, that is—all he got was small change. Maybe Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner also heard ‘We are the masters now’ as the Chinese shot down his proposal for capping imbalances in global current accounts. Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke got the same treatment when he announced a new round of ‘quantitative easing’ to try to jump start the U.S. economy, a move described by one leading Chinese commentator as ‘uncontrolled’ and ‘irresponsible.’ ”  Here (Niall Ferguson)

Criswwell predicts: Ladies and gentlemen…I PREDICT that in another twenty years the Grand Banana Republic will be just another South American country.

Howard’s new five year plan

So Howard Stern signed another five year plan with Sirius. Even though he lost his barbed edge years ago who could blame him for coasting on the coat tails of tens of millions of dollars. Howard, who used to make celebrities wiggle out of appearances because of fear of becoming part of his satirical wit, or just felt uncomfortable with his “bad” reputation, has now become just another overpaid celebrity himself. His real talent lies now in trying to convince his audience that’s he still just one of the old gang, which is probably why he keeps his old radio group together (Robin, Fred, Bababooey, etc.); he even has Jackie the Jokeman working at the same station. Every once in a while I catch Howard, laugh a little, but never stay long (though maybe I’m tuning out before he gets into the good stuff–does he still ever do his rants? His harsh reviews?).

“The experiment”

I read this in disbelief, though knowing what I know about government now I shouldn’t have been surprised in the least: “…New York City is applying the same methodology to assess one of its programs to prevent homelessness. Half of the test subjects — people who are behind on rent and in danger of being evicted — are being denied assistance from the program for two years, with researchers tracking them to see if they end up homeless…” Here.

The criminal state: scary stuff

You know, a few years ago I thought Alex Jones was on the fringe of political comment and extrapolation but not anymore.

The Grand Rotting Banana Republic

Welcome to Zimbabwe …hey, just kidding, Welcome to The Grand Banana Republic (Zimbabwe ain’t this bad): “One of the key signs that we are in the early stages of an economic collapse and that we are heading towards another Great Depression is America’s crumbling infrastructure.  The truth is that our infrastructure is literally falling apart all around us. Thousands of bridges are structurally deficient and there have already been some very high profile collapses.  Over 30 percent of the highways and roads in the United States are in very poor shape.  Aging sewer systems are leaking raw sewage all over the place…” Here.

Note: Nothing has improved (it’s actually getting worse and will continue to worsen if you extrapolate to, say, 2020). Here’s a report from 2007-08: Look out below!

Hahahahahahaha…………………..

This makes my day. “MasterCard.com has been down since about 5 a.m. ET. According to the BBC, hackers who support WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange are taking credit. Earlier this week, MasterCard decided to stop processing payments for the group…”  Here.

December 7th, 1941: Day of Deceit

Past post: Dec 7 1941:  Day of Deceit that will live in infamy

Too bad Wikileaks wasn’t around then; nevertheless, every year more and more material trickles out about FDR’s horrendous malfeasance.

The Grand Banana Republic: rust country

“… The same thing that happened to Detroit is now happening to dozens of other communities across the United States.  From coast to coast there are formerly great manufacturing cities that have turned into rotting, post-industrial war zones.  In particular, in America’s “rust belt” you can drive through town after town after town that resemble little more than post-apocalyptic wastelands.  In many U.S. cities, the “real” rate of unemployment is over 30 percent.  There are some communities that will start depressing you almost the moment you drive into them…” Here.

Related: While the Grand Banana Republic descends to Third World status of the typical two-tier (very rich/very poor) society China will lead the way in technical innovation during the next decade. Here. (Maybe this is the reason: Shanghai students astound educators–came in first in science testing…btw, the Grand Banana Republic came in 23rd.)

Bits and pieces (all of which add up to something ugly)

I guess we all know the federal government is broke so when they need money they just print it up by the billions, but now they’re so incompetent they can’t even print money right (remember, all you can do is laugh). Here.

Authoritarian penis envy? Swedish Condom Police want Wikileaks hero Assange. Here. New and better article here. Update: funny satirical piece by Naomi Wolfe: Julian Assange captured by world’s dating police (here).

Note: I can’t find one “conservative” site (Pajamas Media, Big Peace (etc), NRO, WND, Hot Air, TV’s O’Reilly Factor, big Wall St lovers Rush Limbaugh and Laura Inghram, etc. etc….) that hasn’t fallen prey to corrupt authoritarian neocon symptoms, from their ongoing nostalgia for Inspector Clouseau, aka  George Dubya, and Resident Dr Evil (Cheney) to their vicious attacks on Wikileaks and its founder Julian Assange. Adherents of Jeffersonian democracy evidently died out a long time ago.

Ted Turner: Get sterilized for cash, my friends. Here.

Speaking of Wikileaks…How Wikileaks altered the way we see the world in just a week

Circumventing Chinese government censorship via Kindle: “…Mainlanders have been putting black market “e-readers” to a novel alternative use: Bypassing state censorship. ..Chinese who purchased Amazon Kindle [3G version] have found that they can use its built in web browser to access sites and services – including Twitter and Facebook – which are normally blocked in China. According to media sources, the 3G version of the Kindle uses a high speed GSM cellular connection to connect to a server located outside of China – and thus outside of state censorship… Allowing it to view websites that are normally blocked by Chinese ISPs by bypassing the the ISPs completely in favor of an uncensored American counterpart…” Here.

Back to Wikileaks again: Why is China blocking Cablegate? Well, according to the Angry Chinese Blogger it’s “1) Because it’s Beijing. It’s what it does2) Because some of the cables contained unflattering information regarding China in general, and Beijing in particular…”

Austria: latest country to disembowel Free Speech on the altar of religion. Here.

Back to Wikileaks again: Well after Wikileaks is out of the way, after the Evil forces have had their way with him, we can go back to a more steady dose of the usual big important news, like today’s The Look of Love–Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie Dazzle at the World Premier of The Tourist. Hint: in the near future look for tons of these kinds of articles to make up for the sudden departure of oxygen. In fact, make up a headline and it will probably actually appear… er, like Conan Shaves His Beard LIVE on Basic Cable, or What color crayon did George Bush use to “write” his memoirs? or…well, you get the picture.

Hey, guess what? Back to →Wikileaks.  ”In 1958 a young Rupert Murdoch, then owner and editor of Adelaide’s The News, wrote: ‘In the race between secrecy and truth, it seems inevitable that truth will always win.’ His observation perhaps reflected his father Keith Murdoch’s expose that Australian troops were being needlessly sacrificed by incompetent British commanders on the shores of Gallipoli. The British tried to shut him up but Keith Murdoch would not be silenced and his efforts led to the termination of the disastrous Gallipoli campaign.Nearly a century later, WikiLeaks is also fearlessly publishing facts that need to be made public…” Here.

Can you believe this? Back to Wikileaks again. “Wikileaks founder Julian Assange’s arrest over the dubious rape and molestation claims of two Swedish women is likely a political stunt, after it was revealed that one of the women has connections to the CIA and is a militant feminist who published a guide on how to get revenge on men and make them ‘suffer’…” Here.

The coming authortarian tax monster: “The new ObamaCare1099 rule for reporting of all cash, credit and check business transactions of $600 or more is scheduled to begin January of 2012.  This is really an extension of the 2008 Housing and Recovery Act IRS rules that start this January when merchant banks and PayPal will report business sales directly to the IRS (the reporting threshold is $20,000 and 200 transactions a year)…” Here. Don’t worry, it’s all part of the growing fascism.

Back to the Grand Banana Republic’s growing fascism again: “Last week FCC Commissioner Michael Copps suggested broadcasters be subject to a new ‘public values test’ every four years. Copps said that the test would make a broadcaster’s license renewal contingent upon evidence that they meet a prospective set of federal criteria…” Here.

Foreign youth get a taste of the Grand Banana Republic (it ain’t pretty)

This is what happens when foreign exchange students or J-1 Visa visitors believe the land-of-opportunity myth that has been perpetrated by the Grand Banana Republic all these years (via Hollywood): What they find of course is that they’ve entered a pretty scummy country. ”…This is not what I thought when I paid all this money to come here,” said Natalia Berlinschi, a Romanian who came to the U.S. on a J-1 visa hoping to save up for dental school but got stuck in South Carolina this summer without a job. She took to begging for work on the Myrtle Beach boardwalk and sharing a three-bedroom house with 30 other exchange students…In my whole life, I’ve never lived in that kind of place and that kind of conditions…” Now you know how those born here in this shit hole feel.  Here.

Related: see past post: Foreign exchange students get a taste of the real Grand Banana Republic (and it ain’t pretty). Here.

The great comparative recessions chart

Please write your congressman: tell him you want the country sold to China asap. See article here.

State of the human condition (cont.’)

This mother and these teens are truly the scum of the earth. Here.

Eat my dust…

The Grand Banana Republic may be the biggest debtor nation in the world but in most other respects the writing is on the bathroom wall: China is the new star of the world. Almost half of the tallest buildings in the world are located in China. The GBR has three.  Their cities are booming. “Financial gloom,” writes AP, ” has derailed plans for new towers in Chicago, Moscow, Dubai and other cities. But in China, work on the 2,074-foot (632-meter) Shanghai Tower, due to be completed in 2014, and dozens of other tall buildings is rushing ahead, powered by a buoyant economy and providing a steady stream of work to architects and engineers” (here).  And getting between those modern cities? Bullet trains. China is developing thousands of kilometers of bullet train routes, with sleek 300 mph hour engines. The GBR doesn’t have one. Not only are we behind China, but we’re behind Japan and Europe too. It’s like a horse race that’s already started and we haven’t got out of the chute yet. Read story (here.

When will we start receiving care packages from China?

While China moves directly into the 21st century with its newly rebuilt cities, laid out in gleaming architectural splendor, and its new bullet trains between those cities making not only quickness (for business or pleasure) a marvel but bringing a futuristic thrill to the ride as well, the whole panorama of their success makes our emerging Third World status ever more apparent. With our millions of unemployed, our corrupt greedy banks raping the economy, and our inept and increasingly authoritarian government more concerned with pursuing permanent war than with improving our own social and physical infrastructure China may just feel sorry enough for us to send us care packages of food and clothing. I can see Chinese TV running ads imploring its citizens to send in a few yuan each month to sponsor a malnourished American child.

Secrets buster finds refuge in nuke bunker

Wikileaks’s servers, at least some of them, have been set up in a nuke proof shelter in Sweden. Story here.

Related: Why we need secrets busters. Here’s one example from the economy–here. (BTW, if the government’s so concerned about its secrets why weren’t they encrypted?)

Update: Wikileaks Julian Assange waiting to be arrested for “rape charge”. I just wonder who the female CIA agent is who”pressed” the charge?

Note: After people have read the Wikileaks documents how many could go back to the filtered TV news with all those fake talking heads and “All the News That’s Fit to Print” crap? While goofy O’Reilly opines with with his tired Patriots or Pinheads comedy routine and Olbermann strains his face to a deep hue of purplish red naming Bristol Palin The Worst Person in the World for the night the status of news events has suddenly shifted ahead with Assange’s published revelations of what really goes on in government and corporations. Keep it coming.

 

A few notes…

Military’s revolutionary new rifle, the  XM25 Counter Defilade Target Engagement System, destined for Afghanistan, is described as a game-changer. So confident is the Pentagon with this weapon they say it will easily knock twenty years off the war. Here.

Grand Banana Republic prints up and gives tens of billions to banks (well. over three trillion)–but let’s the unemployed and needy search the dumpsters (I mean that figuratively and literally). Here and here.

Ten top performing cities in the world –no, you’re right, none of the third-world outhouses here in the GBR are on it. Here.

Government gets request from Senator to investigate whether news sites critical of government are (are you ready?)–a threat to national security, er, for example, like the Drudge Report. Here.

TSA breast milk in a glass cage fiasco

“…….He said TSA wants me to play along with their horse and pony show and if I don’t then TSA can have the Phoenix PD arrest me! Well, I wanted to get home to my baby and my flight was 30 minutes from departure so I ‘played along.’ Three Phoenix PD watched in the background…I could tell they all knew this was a waste of their time but I was happy to have them standing by in case TSA continued to act out of line…  Here.